I was very quietly working on Monday which is my work from home day. Studiously working away mind you. All of a sudden, I hear an incessant tapping. My first thought was that some toy belonging to the two kids was running. Except that they'd been gone for hours and we really don't have many toys that run by themselves. So, I tiptoed out into the living room (in broad daylight because I was scared) to find the guinea pigs snoring and certainly not itching or doing some other stupid thing that might have caused the noise that was still going. Then I got the brilliant idea to go outside. Maybe a utility man of some variety was in the driveway performing work and I didn't hear him-- I was studiously working mind you. Went outside to an empty drive way and an asshole woodpecker attached to the back of my house. He responded to, "Hey, asshole! Find someone else to annoy!" by flying away and thankfully not returning.
I then had to explain to my Iranian landlord what a woodpecker was and the damage he had caused. Youtube videos were used for backup. Sometimes I wonder why this stuff happens to me.